The Tipping Point

Epitaph for a dead waiter:"God finally caught his eye."

George S. Kaufman

It's a big restaurant. You are sitting with your friends, enjoying the dinner. From some corner Jazz funk is playing. Laughs, anecdotes, and experiences are being shared. After a while lemon bowl comes up, and with it comes the bill. If it's not a treat, the usual fiscal discussions take place. Finally, it is decided who is going to contribute how much. The money is paid. And after exactly 2 minutes, the waiter comes back with the bill folder. The person nearest to it checks how much is the change. Now, the question comes – should we leave the tip?

Ever since I was a kid I have observed elder people paying bills at a restaurant. Sometimes they keep the tip, at other times they don't. I never dared to ask them why was it so, either way.



But now that I have to pay the bills myself, I am thinking seriously about it. Why, where, and more importantly how much tip I should give?

So I researched, googled I mean :) And Lo! what I found.

The tipping custom is prominent in the western world There they not only give the tip at the restaurant, but also to luggage boys at the hotel, hair stylist, taxi driver and whatnot. They have an old saying 'If you can't afford to tip, you can't afford food at that restaurant.' Better visit McDonald's. Stunning, isn't it? In fact, there are many people enthusiastically debating on the net about how much tip should be given for a particular kind of service. The western folks strive to be gratuity savvy. They even feel sorry when unable to pay the tip. In America there are 'Tip Charts' at every restaurant. The custom is to pay from 10% to 20 % of the total bill. These charts tell you how much your tip should be if your bill is some XXX amount. Of course, there isn't any federal law, it is just a custom. And by the way, there is a long form of TIPS – To Insure Proper Service.


There is no universal tipping etiquette. It changes just like the local dialects. For example, in Europe tips are customary in Britain, France, Germany while it is not necessary in Italy, Switzerland, Sweden.

My frugal second self is shouting - 'Isn't all this essentially looting? Whatever tip etc. is expected, shouldn't it reflect in the menu card itself? We aren't raja-maharajas of yesteryears who liked to gift generously to the servants. Why should we pay the servers, aren't they given salary?'

The answer is yes and no. In western countries major part of a waitperson's income comes from tip credits. Often they are paid below the minimum wage and hence they have to be dependent on the tips to make the ends meet. In a way it's a good system, the waiter who works hard and still keeps a smile gets good tip. His/her job is not just limited to bringing meals, but also answering queries about the menu. So, tips act like an incentive to them. But what if the food is not up to the mark, certainly that is not the fault of the waiter. In this regard following advice is given on wisegeek.com -

Bear in mind that food and service are separate issues. If the food was bad but the service was good, complain to the manager about the food, but tip the server for their efforts. On the other hand, if the food was good but the meal was ruined by poor service, a lower tip can reflect that as well.

By the way, I still don't know who gives tips to the cook. Ultimately it is the chef who prepares our meal. Is the tip we pay distributed equally among the workers? God knows.

There are generous tippers and there are those 'others'. Generous tippers are welcomed cheerily. But what happens to a lousy tipper? I read somewhere that if you don't give the tip servants will spit in your food next time when you revisit the eatery. Here is a warning from a server (as posted on a website)

'Anyone who does not tip, or tips very poorly should know not to eat at the same place more than twice because you have just messed with the person you has your food before you eat it. A server handling their junk then touching your food is the least that will be done.'

I guess this particular waiter looks like this -

Thank goodness, situation isn't so bad in India. Here we can happily eat at a dhaba/hotel without worrying about the tip. Hospitality of an Indian waiter is not directly proportional to the amount of cash he receives from the customer. Well at least it used to be so. Today, Indian cities are becoming more and more western. People are becoming richer by the day, hence by the nights they lessen the burden of the wallets by visiting posh restaurants. When everybody is getting rich, why should waiters be left behind? But then these waiters should also learn some manners from their western counterparts.

A few months ago we had gone for our weekend dinner to a restaurant near our place. The service was kind of average. The busboys weren't prompt, we had to ask three times for filling our empty glasses(of water:). After paying the bill, the bill folder(well, what is the word for the thing in which they take back money?) returned to our table, with a tenner as change. There was an inner pocket in the folder, and the note was kept in it, as if for hiding from me. Now, if a customer wants to leave the tip, s/he will, why play such tricks? I took that note out and returned the cashless folder to the waiter. To my surprise – he frowned and animatedly spoke something in Telugu(my nearest guess) - none of which I understood, except for the word TIP. I thought for a while whether to speak to the manager about this, but then it would have spoiled the nice mood that all of us were in.

You might have witnessed at least one restaurant brawl involving a waiter and a customer. But please, hold that rage. How you treat a waiter can predict a lot about your character. And you don't want to leave a bad impression on others, do you?

Here are some of the customs which are followed in the different regions of the globe. (Source: http://www.airlinecreditcards.com)

In Portugal, usually tipping is not considered a pleasant thing to do in public with other people watching. But it is always quite welcoming money when this is done in private.

Hah! Was that word 'tipping'?

The best advice about tipping in Japan is usually simple: don’t. Handing money directly to a waiter or waitress is considered quite rude and a predominantly Western custom.

I like Japan. :)

Tipping in Egypt, often referred to as baksheesh, can be a complicated custom for foreign visitors. It’s more than just a custom, it’s a way of life. Tips are not only given to those who perform services, but a small tip can also get you granted small favors like admittance into places that would otherwise be closed.

And what are those places?

There is a great debate on whether or not one should tip in Spain. Many, if not most, natives do not leave tips for meals or drinks and often tourists will be the only ones to do so.

Foolish tourists. .

While tipping has generally been frowned upon in communist China, and still isn’t a true part of Chinese culture.

Hindi-Chini Bhai Bhai!

The tipping culture varies all over the world. You should add that point to your checklist while planning a foreign tip. Always bear in mind – when in a Roman hotel leave the tip as Romans do.


P.S. Do you know what is the banner line of the website LousyTippers.com?

P.P.S - Also check out 13 Things Your Waiter Won't Tell You

[Note - To link to the original webpage - just click on the cartoons]